Fire, Lightning, Stars, and a Beautiful Plan

At this moment I am sitting on our roof looking at Gods amazingly beautiful creation. Above is a beautiful starry night, Fuego (a volcano) is spitting lava every few seconds and you can see it running down, and behind that, you can see lighting off in the distance, and every time it goes off it lights up the sky and you can see the dark shadow of the volcanoes (2 visible from our roof). Dose it get much better than this? I have no words to describe the beauty that I am seeing at the moment... and I have been watching this for over an hour (and it was going on for at least an hour before I got home). God must be having a blast showing off what he can do.  

A picture of Fuego my dad took tonight

(After a short break) I am now sitting in the comfort of my own bed after a nice shower to warm me up (it is rather cold on our roof at night time), but I am still thinking about the beautiful sight and the lesson my best friend taught me a little bit ago, a plan. There was somewhere else I would have rather been this evening, but He had a different plan. We get this view in our heads about how our evening, or our week, or our life should go, but when it doesn't happen that way we get disappointed. For me, my view of a beautiful evening would have been a chance to hang out with my friends in the US (not a realistic one, but that is what I wanted). My view of this week, well first off Brittney would not have left for the states, second I would have gotten out of the house more and third I would not be having back pains. My view of my life... well lets just say I would not be in Guatemala, and I would definitely not be  planing on moving to Uganda. Sometimes our idea of a beautiful plan is very different from Gods beautiful plan, but in the end it is beautiful no matter what and it was totally worth giving up our own plan for what he has for us. Tonight, yes I was not exactly where I wanted to be, but instead I got a gorgeous view of volcanoes and lightning and stars. A plan dose not always have to be ready ahead of time, sometimes we just have to let go of our own plans and dreams to live the amazing life the almighty God has planed for us, and I can guarantee you, it will be so much better than what you have planned. 

Everything

"And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this

Cause you're all I want, you're all I need, you're everything, everything."
-Everything by Lifehouse (one of my all-time favorite songs, and if you have not heard it yet, I would strongly suggest you take a few minutes right now to listen to it.)


That last line posted, "You're all I want, you're all I need, you're everything," is an amazing line, but how often do we truly sing it from the heart?


For years now I have known this song, I have sung it, I have loved it, but about 2 weeks ago I came to a realization, I have never truly mean it. Yes, God is all I need, he is all that matters, he truly is everything.... but that is not true in my life, because he is not all that I want. My dad shared with us the other night, if you say, "All I need (be happy) is God and ______," than whatever you put in the blank, is a false God. My 'blank' is my family and the desire for a husband.... I hate to admit it, and it kinda makes me hate myself. I don't like it at all, I am on the missions field, right smack dab in the middle of Gods will..... but that is actually not Gods will if I am not on fire for him. Doing "Gods work" is not Gods work if I am not even right with Him in the first place. Again, He is all I need, and I know that with all my heart, but where exactly are my thoughts and my desires, because that reflects exactly weather or not my God is all I want. He is not all that I want, but that is a wrong set of priorities, that is a very wrong mindset, and I am in the possess of changing that. The first step is realizing it and being able to admit it (which is a lot harder than you realize).... now comes the really hard part, changing yourself to make that line ("You're all I want...") a true statement.

(Sorry, this post is just a bunch of little statements put together, and I hope it all makes sense)